Thursday, August 21, 2008




DIRTY PICK UP LINES
For those, who like abuse!

Is there a mirror in your pant cause i see myself in them.

As long as you need a place to sit, you'll always have my face.

That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning.

How about you sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.

(Tap your thigh) You just think this is my leg.

My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.

If its cash your after drop your drawers and the moneys yours

(Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

Do you sleep on your stomach? Do you mind if I do?

Why are you going, when you could be coming?

Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight.

I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

Wanna come back to my house and do some Maths? You can add the bed, subtract your clothes, divide your legs and we'll multiply.

Let's play war, I'll lay down and you blow the hell out of me!

You're like a championship bass, I don't know if I should mount you or eat you.

Im like domino's pizza, if I dont come in 30 minutes the next one is free.

Man that shirt is becoming you, but if i was that shirt i'd be-cumming too.

Do me if im wrong but you want to kiss me.

Nice legs, at wich hour they open?

You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

It's not going to suck itself.

Hey baby, can I tickle your belly button from the inside?

Do you work for UPS? Because I saw you checking out my package when I walked in here.

How about you sit on my lap and we'll see what pops up?

Guy: Did we fuck last weekend?

Girl: no!

Guy: Im sorry I didnt call you back, you were great........and so was your friend!

There are 206 bones in the human body... do you want another one?

Do you have a keg in your pants? (No! Why?) Cause I'd like to tap that!

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with the rest.

What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My Zipper!

If your left leg is Thanksgiving, and your right leg is Christmas, can I visit you between the holidays?

Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?

My ride left without me , can you give me one?

Let's have breakfast together tomorrow; shall I call you or nudge you?

I may not have gotten your virginity, but can I at least have the box it came in?

Whoa, you just gave me the hardest semi I have ever had.

I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

You must work at Subway, 'cause you just gave me a footlong.

I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you

Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.

Guy: Do you want to do a 68?

Girl: What's that?

Guy: You go down, and I'll owe you one.

Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.

I'm not feeling myself today, may i feel you instead ;)

(Motion with your finger for a girl to come over, when she gets there say) I knew if I fingered you long enough you would cum.

You have some nice jewellery, it would look great on my nightstand

Your face or MINE!?

Do I know you from somewhere, because I don't recognise you with your clothes on?

Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take what I want?

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